This Blog is About a Fart

Check out how classy this place is

Ladies and gentlemen this post is indeed about a fart. The only word to describe this fart is magical, purely magical. My name is Shellie and I fart. Not much of a burper unless I am drinking pop. Generally when I am being hosted I try and control my farts, you know clench your cheeks to the best of your ability, excuse yourself to the bathroom and pray it is silent, or try and at least walk away if something slips out.  Every Sunday I join two very sexy men to watch the Amazing Race, now in season 22 if you can believe it. Tradition is during the first episode of Amazing Race we pick our teams and if your chosen team makes it the furthest you win dinner. Alternating weeks, this particular evening was being hosted at one their places. He has just moved in and there is still plastic on the floor from all the moving and padding in the elevator.

The padding is what made this all possible

Shellie Moment: I had been really good at the clench your butt cheeks technique during this particular evening. I was very relieved when I left and I want you know that I legitimately attempted to make it to my car before releasing the monstrous fart that had been building for the last 1.5 hours! As soon as the elevator doors closed it just happened, no effort or anything, the most glorious magical fart that elevator had ever heard. The acoustics were clear and sharpened the sound waves. It was like one of those sound effects you hear on TV it was that good. Pure magic. I just ooze sex appeal what can I say.